Monday, June 29, 2015

Nana Banana

Tell me you're not gone gone.
Tell me that you've gone to visit family in Minnesota, Maine, Colorado.
Tell me you're off to Branson, Missouri with Papa to watch country music concerts live.
Tell me when I said goodbye to you at Patsy's back in January, that wasn't for good.

I need you. I'm not grown up yet.
I need your hugs.
I need to hear you say, "Hi honey" when you enter the room.
I need your laugh.
I need your reassurance that I'm doing ok in the world.
I need to hear you say, "I love you."
Tell me that you can still do all these things.

I think I understood how your lungs must have felt
Seeing Papa without you by his side made it difficult to breathe
Family with you felt wrong.
Your celebration felt like a party without you invited.
It rained on your memorial celebration.
How can life be complete without your love and humor?
You were Christmas personified.
You were joy and love in the flesh.

I know that if I had my way, it would never be your time.
I also know that my phone will always say "Nana and Papa" for my contacts.
I know that you're in Heaven with all your past family and your son.
I also know that I have things in my life that I wanted you here for.
I know you lived a long life and have pictures with memories to prove it.
I also know that there will be more photos that won't have you in them.

Give me a call and tell me that they're all mistaken.
That I'll be seeing you soon.
That you'll give me a hug
Call me honey
tell me you love me
that all will be ok.

For the rest of my life here on Earth, I'll be waiting for that call.